bleagh, bt called yesterday and we had a fairly Serious Talk about being disconnected. It is true. I don't know why exactly. We've just been together for a long time and often are not in the same place and things are kind of static because somehow we have 0 plans for anything ever. The sense of possibility is somehow lacking. I can't even bring myself to be concerned about this. Either we'll figure it out or we won't. I have no idea how to do anything differently right now. So that happened yesterday, and then this evening I called when I thought he'd be home, and it was kind of a weird call and right at the end i figured out he was slightly stoned and it's hard not to be annoyed. If you want to be connected maybe call me and talk to me before you smoke a joint, huh?

bleagh. I have some regrets.

Packing. heading home tmrw because i happen to have a meeting in my hometown. Not in the mood for anything, but i'm sure it will be fine. I booked a week in Paris for myself at the end of July. I invited bt but I'm not sure he'll have the $$/vacation time/inclination. I'm also pretty happy to go by myself. It's been 10 years since I was in Paris, and that's too long. I have a very clear memory of being there for the first time on my way home after a year in India... and I walked into a store somewhere in Montmartre, grubby and so very very broke, and someone handed me a little glass of champagne and a slice of foie gras on a cracker, because Paris and Christmas, and I nearly wept. And the Musee D'Orsay. And passing icecubes between mouths at some nightclub with my friends. And some incredible meal another friend took me to, and she, being parisien, ate half of everything while I, being not parisien, scarfed it all down. I would have eaten her half too, but i knew she'd be appalled. Fun.

8:42 p.m. - 2015-05-25