the old mutt - our old mutt - is 13 and this week for some reason his back legs have been weaker and weaker. This evening he could not get up and he just lay there and looked at me. i crooned to him and gave him a biscuit with peanut butter and rubbed his legs then lifted him up and held him in a standing position until he got his balance. I held my breath until he got steadier and skittered off into the living room.

i love him, but e REALLY loves him. he is one of the most important thing in her life. She's talking about acupuncture. i want to cover my eyes and look away for this next part.

* * *

Post mardi gras. This weekend is always a low. I spent the day cleaning up from the extended party (there were a minimum of 6 people in this house at any given time, and often it was double that). Once in a while my mind would wander. Whimsy and wistful and a hand through my hair. A glance. Heat. Then I'd yank myself back to now. I did laundry. i drank water. I worked. it was a drag, this coming back to real life. Fortunately, new orleans is never entirely like real life so i'm off to hear some hip hop at the old opium den.

9:46 p.m. - 2009-02-28