10:50 a.m.
I blame my scatteredness on last night. i drank and smoked too much, and suddenly it was one am and i was stumbling home with my roommate and my neighbour, a messy, giggling drunken disaster.
it seemed like a good idea at the time, but now I'm scattered. To top it off, this morning I spent my entire shower reliving my most awkward exchange ever. It involved me asking my favorite bartender about his baby... except I guess I just assumed that it was his baby. He looked at me very hard and said, "i don't know what you mean". (but then whose baby is it? you see a pregnant woman and a man together enough, you might assume it's his? nope. don't assume. ass. you and me. and all that).
ugh, it was so awkward that i cringe thinking about it now. I was stupified and could not form a coherent sentence to get myself out of the awkwardness. how unfortunate.
now I'm huddled in my office and everything i have to do feels like an enormous hurdle. and i did this to myself.
onward.
2008-10-01
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