last night i went to a friend's house to watch the game (we lost... *sniff* go leafs go) i left around ten, and i could feel something... the back of my neck was prickling. and then out of the corner of my eye, i saw him.
quietly, coasting on his bike so there would be no sound. he stuck to the shadows. he followed me all the way home.
i rollerbladed faster than i ever have before, reached my apartment and breathed a sigh of relief, cursing myself for blading home at 10pm, even though i took busy, well lit streets.
but now...now i am furious. why can't i rollerblade home whenever i want?? this is a fear particular to women; i don't think men can understand. the faint panic when a car slows down beside you, the quickening of steps if someone comes too near, the harassment and catcalls if you wear a skirt that's too short.
when i was fifteen, kristen french was abducted. i used to spend my walks planning escape routes in case someone tried to attack me. i still do that, sometimes.
On Saturday night, i was walking down Rideau St. and a car full of guys cruised by and slowed down to look.... they did a U-turn and followed me around a corner, all creepy eyes and sexual insinuation. i was wearing baggy jeans and a sweatshirt. i was with a male friend. i was just trying to walk down the street.
the more i think about it all, the angrier i become. it is time to take back the night. i will no longer accept this fear. i do not want my daughters to know it. i'm not sure what we can do, but there must be something.
and
9:17 a.m. - 2001-05-08
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