Last night felt great but this morning it is clear that was just the 3 glasses of wine on an empty stomach.

now, so jittery - jet lag and too much coffee - I can't stop drinking it, i love it, that little buzz in my brain with the first sip as the caffeine makes something click into place. Can't i have one vice? and also how unfair that now *coffee* has to be counted as a vice for me. But it's clear that whenever I drink it (and as I said, I can't stop drinking it), I do not sleep. I refuse to place coffee on the list of things I love but (mostly) deny myself: pot, drinking too much, cheeseburgers, cigarettes. Come on, can't I keep coffee?

I think it's been 6 weeks of travel, now I'm back in Madagascar. All these meetings and also breakfast/lunch/dinner with colleagues - not enough alone time, I'm feeling fairly discombobulated.

*

just remembered a thing I loved about living in new orleans: the joy of walking down the street and suddenly having my day ping off something beautiful and random in a new direction - a parade, a new friend, an old friend, a brass band on the corner, watching boats on the mississippi. I don't have a lot of space in my life for that anymore. Need to think about that.

10:29 a.m. - 2017-07-20