talking to BT yesterday he pointed out that i say "meh. it is what it is" so often that he is getting worried. He is right, I say it all the time. To what world religion does this mantra most closely correspond?

You see, these days i'm mostly working all the time, both on my dissertation research and on some consultancy work. I know you're not supposed to get *involved* when you're doing consultancies, but I can't help it, it's just who i am. There are a lot of power politics in the sector I work in, and my boss has a new manager who is everything arrogant and bad about this world-reviled institution that I decided to sell my soul to.

So I'm not loving it and in a lot of ways it makes it easy for me to be glad that i'm wrapping up my research in december, the analysis will be finished in february... then i don't have to come back here if i don't want to, which makes me feel free free free.

also a bit free-falling, but one can't have everything.

*

I talked to my sister on the phone for a long time yesterday and I started weeping as she told me about all the cool things she's doing... Okay, the weeping was unnecessary, I'm overdramatic. But the point is that of course I am not sad for her -it's awesome that her life is so great - but I am sad for me, because i went into this field for the adventures and now it doesn't really feel like I get any.

AND when I do get adventures, they are wonky. For example, this weekend i went hiking with the masters students i'm working with. We got lost in the forest and met a guy hopped up on qat who tried to beg money from us and then threatened me with a rock when we refused (we really didn't have any money. never say no to a mugger, unless maybe he is a bit shorter then you, outnumbered, and only armed with a rock). Suddenly everything was a bit is-this-really-happening as I had to grapple with him on the side of a steep hill, if you can believe it. As we scuffled, one of the students threatened him with a water bottle and eventually he got scared and called out to his friend in amharic, kind of like this:
mugger: dude, i could really use some back-up here as i grapple this woman on the side of this steep hill.
mugger friend: dude, there is no way i'm coming over there, those girls are FIERCE
so suddenly he bent very low, apologized profusely and then they ran away. We ran in the opposite direction. I broke my beloved Ray-Bans in the wrestling match but otherwise emerged unscathed. Then we got even more lost and other adventures ensued. Misadventures is probably a better word.

Meanwhile, my sister is playing in a band. That's more my kind of adventure. How did I get here again?

and since I am documenting violent encounters, i should note that the other day someone grabbed my ass as i stood near a taxi, and i got mad and punched him in the jaw. the last time I did that was in New Delhi, around 2004.. did I ever write about that? I figure that as long as i can count the individual times I've had to punch someone, i am okay. So yes, adventures. but seriously?

The point is... what is the point? the point is, meh.

10:56 a.m. - 2010-10-13