Good weekend, full of fun both expected and unexpected. Saturday was a perfect March day - clear blue skies and bright sunshine - promising spring really is coming. I was so tired and when i leaned over to put on my boots i tasted the previous night burning sour in my mouth and realized i was hungover. And it didn't matter; The energy was coming from somewhere and I was in the happiest mood all day. Flaky hot jamaican patties on a sidewalk in the sunshine and I wondered, how can life get better? I was spaciness personified, but for once i was safe; We stuck together because no one was ready to think on his own. But then suddenly it was over and I still wasn't ready for it to be finished.

I felt stupidly teary as I saw the little trio of my favorite people more or less splitting up to go their separate ways again. I wish I didn't have favorite people scattered all around the globe. Thinking too much about it makes me nostalgic and there's no point because i can't go back, nor would i really want to. In the last two years, i really learned that i can't dwell on things that change, regardless of whether they're brutal, sad, or just different. And I can't just bury my head in work or school and hope things will just resolve themselves. I learned a lot in the last two years, i did. Now I'm here i can see how much I have changed.

Sometimes it bothers me when i think how little control i have over anything. Timing and chance and right place at the right time/wrong place at the wrong time and you can be deliriously happy or dead. It reduces my motivation to plan.

Walking east late Saturday afternoon, the people coming toward me were drenched in sunlight. An oddly assymetrical man in an orange jacket was nearly incandescent. It hurt to look at him but i couldn't look away.

12:22 p.m. - 2005-03-07