something funny just happened.

being out here and being so fucking self reliant all the time. And then in between getting buoyed up by sporadic contact from old life: emails, sometimes guestbook entries, lucky msn coincidences. I feel... okay.

Just like that. That things are okay. That they are fine. That they will flow and i will be happy, and i will now accept things that were wrenching with some semblance of grace.

[not this election, though. *breathe* need a lot more zen than this]

and i've got some conflicts to deal with
but i will extend the necessary olive branches, and i really believe that the outcome is no longer in my hands and that's nice too.

like it's not just my loss. it's yours. or mutual. but it's NOT just me. what a lovely feeling.

8:38 p.m. - 2004-11-04